Don’t be late for your own funeral

Mi Funeral 2

Ever wondered what it would be like to be at your own funeral?  I have.  I wondered if all my friends would show up and who would cry.  Would my family break down?  What would they say about me? How awesome I was? Well for one lucky Brazilian, he got his questions answered.  He was present at his own funeral.  No, not in a coffin in a coma.  He was literally looking down on his dead body.  Ok, let me straighten things out here.

A car wash attendant in Sao Paulo, Brazil was shot to death and his body taken to the morgue.  For some strange reason, the body was thought to be of a different attendant and the brother was brought down to identify him.  He claimed it was indeed his brother who was lying dead and funeral arrangements were made by the family.

At the wake, the very much alive dead guy walked in to announce that he was alive and kicking.  Well some people ran, some fainted and one guy pulled out a gun and shot the now dead-but-was-alive guy, killing him instantly.  (Okay, I added that last bit for emphasis. Sue me).

After the minor interruption, everyone all laughed ‘kkkkk’ and sat down to a nice meal of whatever Brazilians eat at funerals.  While they were enjoying the meal that was for the once-thought-dead-but-now-alive man, the real dead man rose up in his coffin and declared, ‘What the hell is going on here?”  To which someone reply, “We are enjoying a meal here, lie down and shut up!”  “Not over my dead body!” The real dead man retorted.  (Yes, that was added on for emphasis too.  Double sue me).

In the end, a brawl broke out when the (I am tired of saying this) alive-but-thought-dead guy  realized the real-dead guy was wearing his clothes.  He ripped them off immediately and the father, realizing he had spent hard-earned money on a coffin for his once-thought-dead son, dumped the real dead guy out so he could return it for a refund.  So here is a naked dead guy on the floor while the family drink skol.

I’m having a hard time differentiating truth from fiction here and getting carried away with this so go read it for yourself here.

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