This morning on the local rock radio station, the dj’s were making fun of a guy who was blessed, or cursed, with a 13″ penis. Yes, you heard me right. The man had a penis to make an elephant jealous. Alright, that’s a bit much, the elephant comparison I meant. His penis is peanuts to an elephant’s. Anyways he had a huge member. Still does.
So curious me, I went and scoured the internet to read more about this phenom. Apparently, he’s been in the news since the early 2000s and was featured in talk shows and HBO specials. All because of his penis. (So if this is old news to you, pardon my ignorance.) Jonah Falcon, and if that name doesn’t scream to be in porn then I don’t know porn, has also been stopped at airports due to the significant bulge in his pants. “Sir! Sir! Yes you there with the bulge. Are you packing?”
“No ma’am, it’s just my penis. I can show you but you will have to stand back. No, farther than that.” Ah, the poor guy and his penile weapon.
Some more facts about Jonah’s penis. Flaccid, it’s only 9.5″ but sitting up straight, a respectful 13.5″. He claims that his foreskin can completely cover a door knob. Which door knob did he use? Good thing I wash my hands after handling door knobs. Jonah is also single. At least last time I checked. He’s having some problem finding like receptacle to accommodate him. He is also bisexual but that wouldn’t change that he still has to find an accommodating partner. I also think Jonah chooses to pee out of a window than take the chance of getting his tip dipped in urine by using a toilet.
Jonah is also an actor and should they do a movie based on my life as a player, I would choose him to be my body double.
Good luck, Jonah!