Did I tell you I had a new job? Well I did and if I didn’t then it probably wasn’t your business anyways. But yes, I did. And out of over 200 employees in the big office of this big company, I happen to be the only black guy. Or gal. Or thing.
Am I complaining? Heck no! I love the attention. All of a sudden I’m the cool dude in the workplace. I can just see the husbands and boyfriends telling their girlfriends and wives about this cool black guy who is working with them. Or vice versa. Now I’m not sure if I am the token black guy or what happened to the others, if there were others. Lynched? Just kidding! Why the serious face?
Anyways, I want you to remain tight-lipped on this. I don’t want the good reverend Jesse Jackson and that other guy there, hmm… can’t remember his name, showing up at my work screaming racism. No sir. I am enjoying my new-found status. I am loving this. Don’t hate!
By now you may have heard about the Canadian lover boy, Jian Ghomeshi, if not, go back in your hole until you do. Jian will sleep with anything and anyone. Authors, actresses, students, young, old, men, chickens…yes I said chickens. What? You didn’t know?
After the countless women came forward with claims of being choked during sex by Jian, a male accuser also stepped forward but he was only fondled by Ghomeshi. But his pet chicken is now the latest to step up. Yes, I did say his pet chicken.
Apparently the chicken is accusing Jian of, yes you guessed it, of choking him! Jian Ghomeshi choked his chicken too! After choking just about every chick in the country, how could he even find the time to choke his chicken? That Ghomeshi is something else…