Christmas is like an orgasm

English: Uploaded from : http://upload.wikimed...

English: Uploaded from : http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/de/5/5c/Rockefeller_Center_Weihnachten.JPG Das Rockefeller Center in New York City zur Weihnachtszeit Eigene Aufnahme Lechhansl 15:53, 20. Jan. 2007 (CET) Dezember 2003 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

I love Christmas but what I really enjoy is not the day itself but the days leading up to it. After Christmas it’s like everyone suddenly exhaled . Whoosh! Christmas is finally over so now I can be myself!  But seriously, you know what I mean, right?  The weeks leading up to the Big Day is all fun.  Fun at work and at home.  Even at the malls. One could get away with murder!  Well not literally.  The day itself goes much too fast.  Like how much can you really eat and drink?  And I find it a bit of a let-down.  You know like that wicked build up you get prior to an orgasm and you anticipate an explosion but your partner changed whatever he was doing so instead of explosion you get maybe something more like an implosion?  You know what I mean, don’t play coy with me!

 

So how is Christmas like an orgasm?  Well after all the build up, it’s over before you know it.  Bam! Just like that.  Oh! Oh! Christmas is coming! It’s coming! Oh yes! Yes! Yesssss!!!!  Don’t stop Christmas! Shit!  You stopped!  And before you know it, it’s back to the same old same old.  Grumpy shoppers, selfish people. No post-sex cuddles.  Just wham bam thank you ma-am Christmas.