Last Wednesday, the wife and I decided to take in a movie as part of our anniversary celebrations. We went to see Pacific Rim in 3D as the reviews were glowing and a couple of our friends raved about it.
We were mildly surprised to find an almost empty theatre when we walked in. We thought it would be packed considering how well it was doing but it was great to be able to choose where we wanted to sit. We sat a couple of rows up and not too far from the aisle. The row below us and behind us were uninhabited. Bonus!
While the previews were rolling, a young couple walked down the aisle in front of us looking for a seat. Come on guys! Go farther away! I would like to put my feet up on the back of this chair once the movie starts so please wander off in search of better pasture. He apparently didn’t hear my thoughts sent his way or chose to ignore me. They sat down right in front of us! The nerve…
Uh huh! They are getting up! There is a God and he’s right here in this place! Thank you father for hearing my prayers. The couple decided immediately upon sitting down, that being in front of us was not the best place for them. They stood up, surveyed the expanse of the room then the geeky boyfriend pointed to some seats in our row. Seriously buddy? My row? It’s our fricking anniversary here! Can’t we get some semblance of privacy just for a couple of hours? Again, they ignored my mental pleas.
They decided it would be faster to just jump over the chairs and so they did. Only one seat separated us from these squatters. But they weren’t done. They still weren’t happy. Not close enough, apparently.
We heard geeky boyfriend say to his girlfriend, “Move down.” My wife and I looked at each other. Are you trying to get her to sit in our laps? Are you going for a swinging thing here son? I’m all in but here’s not the place. See us in the parking lot after but in the meantime, beat it and leave us alone! His girlfriend ignored his request so he leapfrogged her and now he’s sitting hip to hip with my wife. Perfect!
If you had walked into that mostly empty theatre, you would have concluded that we came together. (No, not that kind of ‘came’. Stop thinking dirty!). We looked like two couples that came out on a double date except they were geeky but cool couples sometimes have geeky couple friends, right? Do you?
I am not sure what made these folks cuddle up to us like that. We weren’t exactly sitting in prime seats or anything but here they were, crowding our personal space like an unwanted kid. My wife later said she should have farted.
Young fella, if you and your little missus are reading this, what’s up with that, bro?