Designer Designs Dress That Turns Transparent When Wearer Is Sexually Aroused

r-TRANSPARENT-DRESS-large570I am not joking.  I just read this.  I know I shouldn’t believe everything that I read but it is legit.  A designer has actually come up with a dress that gets transparent when the person wearing it gets sexually aroused.  It is called ‘Intimacy 2.0’ and it just punted that new Facebook app, Bang With Friends, right out of the park.  This is the next big thing!

I admit that being a man, my first, ok my second thought was, ‘Are they designing pants like that for me?’  I then got carried away with mental scenarios.

I am in class and suddenly noticed that hot chick next to me is slowly losing her clothing.  It is disappearing!  The thought that she’s having sexual thoughts makes my intimacy 2.0 pants start disappearing also.  Right there in class! Oh no! Oh yes!

Me:  (to hot chick)  See what you did?

Hot Chick:  What did I do?

Me:  Well you got horny and made me horny thinking of you being horny and now we are both sitting here with our junk exposed.  Thanks a lot!

Hot Chick:  That’s not my fault.  I didn’t tell you to get horny.

Me: Duh…I’m a man. Of course I would react to your reaction

Hot chick: Sorry, I was just thinking of Mr. Grey

Me:  Oh by the way, can I at least add you on Facebook to my filf list?

Hot Chick:  What’s that?

Me:  Never Mind.

I know, I am such a dreamer…always getting carried away with my overactive imagination.  But just think though, if this design ever take off, (pardon the pun), every party could be an orgy, every beach a nude beach.  Even the churches won’t be sacred. (Another pun). Your girlfriend would make you wear an intimacy 2.0 pants around her girlfriends to see if you have the hots for any of them.  “Aha! I saw that! You want to bang my friend Alice, don’t you?  I can see your pee pee, you horn dog!”

Man, wouldn’t it be an ego boost to walk past a group of women and see their clothes react?  You want a piece of this, don’t ya?  Well don’t just stand there, come and get it!  Not so fast Mary.

I have never bought into the myth that what women wear makes them deserving of being raped and I still don’t but I do think that any woman wearing an intimacy 2.0 is asking for trouble.  Unless of course they wear it in the privacy, comfort and safe confines of my house.

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Banging My Facebook Friends or FILF

bangwithfreinds-300113Calm down, this blog is now what it seems.  I don’t go around having sex with my Facebook friends. What do you think it is?  Sexbook?  Ok, well maybe there’s a couple (Not that kind of couple) who I have had intimate relationships with and we are now friends on Facebook but…nevermind.  None of your business anyways.

This morning, I heard on the radio that there’s a new Facebook app that users could use to let their friends know that they are able, willing and capable to have intimately casual encounters of the sex kind. WOW!  Yes, you heard me right.  There IS an app for that!

Well being Mr. Investigative Reporter, I got on my google and ‘googled that shit’ as my buddy would say.  Turns out it’s legit. There’s a new Facebook sex app called ‘Bang With Friends’ that you can use to hook up and do the deed.  The horizontal or parallel mambo.  The thing.  Sex.  In four days after it was launched, it garnered 20,000 users.  This just put a whole different spin on ‘poking’ and ‘Friends with benefits’.

I know your curiosity juices are flowing uncontrollably so I won’t bore you anymore with the trimmings.  You want to know how this thing works, right? Well users sign in with Facebook, go through their friends’ list, pick the friends that they would like to enjoy some er…bedtime with, ok the filf, and the friends get a message that you are interested in something more and if they feel the same way, they reciprocate.  Then bang! bang! it’s done! Like dinner!  Read here.

It’s supposedly very discreet and private.  Sort of like those hookers in Vegas that come to your room.  So don’t worry about your friend yapping to her other friends who are also your friends who are also friends with your wife.  “Girl, you won’t believe who wants to have sex with me.”  “Noooo! Not him! Really? Isn’t he married with children?”

Now this is actually one of those things you just want to try.  I won’t as I’m happily married and casual encounters of the sex kind scares me but I’m just so tempted to click on someone’s name and see what happens.  I might get a private message with one word.  ‘When?’

If you haven’t done so yet, don’t forget to add the group ‘FILF’ to your Facebook friends filter and thank me later.  With 700+ friends, I hope there’s at least one friend who finds me desirable.