Friday Double Folly: Waitress, This Coffee Tastes Like Shit!

Green logo used from 1987-2010, still being us...

Green logo used from 1987-2010, still being used as a secondary logo. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A shitty bit of news today, it is alleged, and alleged is the operative word here, that a Starbucks coffee in Hong Kong is using water from the bathroom to brew its coffee.

Now this might sound like a big cup of crap to you but for the coffee lovers out there, this is the shit!  Who wants to add the taste of crap to their morning breath? Now when someone says you have morning breath you can now respond with, “Nah, it’s just my Starbucks.”

When approached by the media, a Starbucks employee feigned surprise. “What? Coffee taste like shit?  Can’t be.  The bowls were cleaned only yesterday.  Mr. Yen! Hey, Mr. Yen!”  (Loosely translated).

The manager, Mr. Yen apparently came to the employee’s rescue and told the media, “Get lost! Drink shit and die!”

His suggestion may have come too late for some.  Have a great weekend! And remember, if there’s corn in your coffee, it’s not a good thing.

 

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The Mysterious Woman At The Freshly Pressed Coffee House and Restaurant

IMG00074-20100801-1906Everyone at The Freshly Pressed Coffee House and Restaurant turned to look.  Some stared without apology.  I didn’t.  I couldn’t.  I looked up casually and went back to my work.  I was perched on a weathered looking chair at a crooked and unpainted table in a corner of the coffee shop area.  From my vantage point, I could see who was entering or leaving and that’s how I saw her enter.  I was on a mission and couldn’t be derailed by the sight of a woman.  I was intent on writing THAT blog.  The big one.  The one that would get my name up there with the pros. This woman would not rob me of this opportunity!

The Freshly Pressed Coffee Shop and Restaurant is far from being an upscale restaurant.  The decor is limited and consists of wooden tables covered by white and cheap looking tablecloths.  The chairs are not comfortable.  Hardwood floors looked ready for a makeover. In fact, the entire restaurant screamed for a makeover.  With its dimly lit interior, you really needed the coffee to keep you awake, unless you kept awake by blogging about something interesting.  The lingering aroma of every different blend of coffee hangs in the air mixed with whatever food was hot out of the kitchen.  Despite what it didn’t have going for it, it was invitingly warm and cozy and the atmosphere was very welcoming.  It had a homely feel to it and that’s why I chose to blog here.  It was my Eden.  My little niche was situated in the farthest and darkest corner.  From my vantage point, I could the comings and goings but usually don’t.

From the corner of my eye I saw the woman make a bee line for the table right next to mine.  I smelled her perfume before she was close enough to fully drink her in.  Liz Taylor perfume? No, too young. She was only about 30 was my guess and a stunner!  A definite head turner.  Now it was my turn to stare at the thing of beauty.  Kate Hudson and Jessica Alba all rolled into one.  Her long blonde hair flowed orderly down the nape of her neck which had a red silk scarf hanging loosely around it.  She wore a low-necked black blouse complemented by a hip-hugging and contour-revealing black skirt that flirted with the top of her knees.  Black leather boots came up her long legs.  Her face was angelic.  Brushed with a light touch of makeup and a hint of lipstick on her pouty lips.  I also noticed that she wore no wedding band.  In fact, her long and well manicured fingers were bare.  Not that it would have made a difference to me.  She was out of my league.  Plus I was a married blogger.  In love with this mysterious but beautiful woman whose peach-like lips opened up partly to reveal her magnificent pearly whites in a smile.  She smiled at me!

Now where was I?