As we draw closer to the predicted Doomsday, I was passing time by wondering how some of the people close to me would react if we found out a few days prior, that Doomsday is in fact real. 100%.
I might get a memo at work from the boss: “Guys, we have just been told that Doomsday is for real. This throws a wrench into production and our bottom line. We are now forced to move month end up to December 20th. Please have all your figures in. I wish you and your family a safe Doomsday. Sales, please finalize all contracts. Thank you.” “P.S. We will break early on the 20th so we could spend time with our families but those who wish to stay at work are welcome to do so. They will be paid overtime.”
My mom would panic. Everything panics her. She would call me a dozen times in the same minute. “Did you hear the news? Just heard it on CNN or was it TSN? or TNN? one of those stations. The Gloomsday is coming.” You mean ‘Doomsday’ mom? “Yeah Yeah, Doomsday. I have to go catch up water and pack some clothes and go to Walmart and Dollarama and Giant Tiger.” Clothes mom? Why are you going shopping? Nevermind, talk to you later. “Make sure you guys catch up water too.” Ok mom. “Oh and by the way, Walmart has half-off sales on everything. No returns or exchanges but you can walk out with stuff as the greeter has called in sick.” Bye mom.
My mother-in-law would be almost the same. Calling us every two minutes. “I saw it on the PVR that the thing is for real, guys. What do they call it? Doomsy or Tombsday?” You mean Doomsday? “Yeah, whatever, hahaha. Are you guys scared? I am not. As a matter of fact, I’m drunk right now. hahaha. No shit. Your father-in-law is drunk too” (She’s not a drunk).
My Dad would try to be Mr. Know-it-all as usual. As he toys with his umpteenth drink he would say to no one in particular, “Doomsday is bunk. Not gonna happen. Hic! Trust me. It’s impossible. Hic! I bet you on my children’s lives that it won’t happen. Where and who are my children anyways? Ah who cares? Never cared about them then, I still don’t care now” Hic…Hic.
What would my wife do? She would make sure everything was clean. Not sure about the logic there. Maybe having a clean environment would turn the Doom off. “It’s our last chance to clean. Let’s make it count guys. Oh, let’s get the Christmas tree up too. Come on! Move it! We don’t have all week! Get off your ass!” Ok honey.
Good thing it’s not going to happen. Or is it? Hey, Do they blog in heaven? Follow me and we’ll find out together.
- Mayans Pissed Off Over Doomsday ‘Deceit’ (news.discovery.com)
- U.S. government assures world will not end in 2012 (cbc.ca)
- 2012 Ends and China Tweets Doomsday – Bloomberg (bloomberg.com)
- Survival kits and trips to hell, doomsday hysteria grips Russia (rt.com)
- TV Tuesday: Doomsday Preppers (canada.com)
- 21/12/12 – Tibetan monks make a statement for NASA Doomsday (talesfromthelou.wordpress.com)
- Is Dec. 21 really a Mayan doomsday? (cbc.ca)
- Preparing for the end of the world – again (stuff.co.nz)
- Doomsday Hysteria Hits Russia (the2012scenario.com)
- NASA to Doomsday Preppers: You’re Wrong (VIDEO) (blippitt.com)