Have you ever loitered outside a gym? Maybe Shapes? Come on, you can admit it, we are all friends here on WordPress. Anyways, I haven’t either. Well not exactly loitered, maybe spent longer than necessary but nothing deserving a call to the local police to have me removed.
Recently, I was outside the Shapes gym in my area, minding my own business. OF COURSE I WAS! HOW DARE YOU DOUBT ME AND QUESTION MY MOTIVES? Have you ever looked at the people going into and coming out of Shapes? It’s usually Shapes since it’s one of the top class gyms around. And I don’t mean leer, I meant look, like the way I was looking.
I saw a guy walking towards the door. He had this look on his face that said, “Yeah, look at me, I’m heading in there for a heavy workout. I pump iron.” He walked with a swagger and an attitude. He glanced around a few times to make sure he was seen getting into a gym.
Behind Mr. muscle-head, came a hot looking number clad in lulu lemon workout gear. She walked with a brisk determination towards the door. Her walk said, “I can’t wait to get in there and do my shit and get out.” or maybe, ‘Whose that idiot sitting in the car?’
I saw chicks walked in looking like they were on a runway, some had so much makeup, their facial muscle had to be been hard from lifting all that weight. I saw guys strut in looking like King Shit. Or just a gay Arnold. Is that what gyms do to people?
Driving away, well even a stalker must leave sometime, I noticed blondie to my left getting ready to get into her car after a hard workout. I know it was hard because her lulu-lemon-clad butt testified to that. She saw me looking and flashed me ‘the look’. It’s the look that said, ‘Haul your lazy ass in there and get in shape instead of sitting around out here watching us! You little pervert!” Honestly babe, it’s not like that, you see I was just in the neighborhood and…and…nevermind.