Running Woman Makes Blogger Breaks Vow

English: Running woman Nederlands: Hardlopende...

English: Running woman Nederlands: Hardlopende vrouw (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Dear readers, I have a problem. You see, I have this habit of double glancing everytime I see a beautiful woman.  It doesn’t help that I think women are God’s most beautiful creation, bar none. If a woman walks past me in yoga pants, lululemon or tight jeans, I can’t help but look back to see if she looks as good leaving as she did coming. Nothing sexual or lustful, just pure admiration for the fairer sex and the presentation. I am happily married and think my wife is the cat’s meow so I guess it’s more like admiring your neighbor’s expensive red jaguar. Not wanting the expense but thinking it’s still a beauty to admire. So now you get where I’m coming from?  Don’t want you to start judging me, calling me a playa and all that, because I swear, that’s not how it is at all.  Don’t judge be because of that last post. Here.

But anyways, I am not writing this blog to confess my bad habit to you, no sir/ma’am.  The reason I’m blogging is actually to tell you what happened on Saturday morning.  My 8-year-old has soccer practice on Saturday mornings and instead of taking turns driving him, I told the wifey that I would do the honors. I am more of the morning person and enjoy the alone-time, drinking my coffee while I wait for him.  Going to MacDonald’s for breakfast after is a good deal maker too.  So anyways, while standing on the side of the field, I caught myself double looking at a female coach who was coaching some 5-6-year olds. Yes, she was wearing lululemons. Or were they yoga pants? I was mad at myself and made a mental vow that starting immediately, I would not give any woman the double-look again.  I vowed to be strong. I had to stop before it got out of hand, right? So yep, no more checking out the grass on the other side. Done!

While enjoying my new-found emancipation from this binding addiction, movement on my periphery caught my attention.  I turned my head and saw it was just a blonde young woman, dressed in lululemon pants, or were they yoga? and matching top, out for a run.  Her pony-tailed hair swooped from side to side like a horse’s. (Oh, that’s why they call them pony tail! Aha moment!).

Kinda like her

 

Vow forgotten, tossed to the wind like torn up paper, I double glanced.  Yup, I did.  It was the hair, I swear!  She probably used it to put weak men with vows in trances. Mesmerize us.  Had to be. as here I was, double, triple, quadruple glancing, waiting for her to go by to see if she had the correct running form. She did! He hips, shoulders and entire body was a mass of rhythm. I was proud of her. Like a running coach admiring his star athlete.

Ok, nothing is as beautiful as a woman and nothing is as graceful as a human running.  See where I’m going with this? So yup, I broke my vow before it was even cooled from exiting the warmth confines of my thought. I disgraced the school of thought.

Honey, let’s go running.  Better yet, you go running around the block while I watch.  Yes, around the bed is fine too…

 

Check this out:

https://funnysideupandscrambled.wordpress.com/2015/05/18/its-all-about-the-sunscreen-honestly/

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It’s All About The Sunscreen, Honestly!

I am always on the lookout for products that can prolong my life. Be it pills, food, hygienic practices or even sunscreen.  Yes, sunscreen. Don’t you know too much sun can cause skin cancer? So quite naturally I saw a piece trending on yahoo with photo too:

Alarming study: Your sunscreen may not work. (Getty Images)

Alarming study: Your sunscreen may not work. (Getty Images)

Well of course I had to check it out!  The story I meant. Not the blonde and the brunette, silly! In fact I didn’t even notice them until later, much later. So I clicked on the link and it took me to the meat of the story with another accompanying pic.

Alarming Consumer Report Study: Your sunscreen may not work

Wow! Look at that! The story I mean.  Our sunscreen just may not work! OMG! that’s hot! The sun I mean! And honey dear, I swear, it was all about the sunscreen…

 

 

Friday Folly: Me And My Anti-Ball Crusher

Something like this but different.

Thanks to Lululemon, my balls could now breathe easily.  With my wearing of all those balls-unfriendly pants, it’s no wonder I suffered from blue balls continuously. The below pic is not of it but it’s all I could find.

Lululemon has invented a pants for us men to protect our jewels.  It’s like a jock strap with legs.  I am not sure how it works but it does! I tried on a pair and noticed the difference immediately.  I can’t explain it but my balls just didn’t feel so crushable.  I dared my balls crusher wife to try her stuff on me and you know what? She couldn’t crush my nuts!

Thank you LuLu.  Now can I have some Anti-blueballs pants?

My World Cup Soccer Crush

I have a confession.  I am a soccer fan and I am following The World Cup but it’s held in Brazil. I know, I confuse you there.  You are going, “Yeah, we know it’s in Brazil, so what?” I love Brazilians. There, I said it.  Let me explain before I totally lose you.

In case you are ignorant to such things, Brazil to me, has some of the hottest women in the world. (Must be the weather). And they love soccer. And when they love to wear cut-off jeans.  You know the ones with the pockets hanging lower than the cut-off? Yeah. So as I watched the beautiful and artistic game of soccer, I can’t help but also enjoy seeing the Brazilian gals draped patriotically in their country’s flag, smiling back at me from my big screen tv.  It’s distracting, it’s heavenly, it’s soccer! Viva Brazil!

So I think I now watch the World Cup with ulterior motives.  Throw me a bone here, you probably do the same too. At least I actually do like the game, do you? It’s not my fault I have good taste in women and I like beautiful things. My wife can attest to that, she’s prime example. Shit! Gotta go, there’s a game on!

Note: The other South American Countries are well represented as well and are holding their own quite nicely.

Arriba!

Arriba!

 

CBS Says No To Crack At Grammys

42nd Annual Grammy Awards - Pressroom

If you were planning on watching the Grammy awards to catch a glimpse of some skins, you know a nipple slip here, a butt cheek there or if you are lucky, a pale crack, think again.   CBS has issued an advisory to stars to keep their privates private.  The email read:

CBS Program Practices advises that all talent appearing on camera please adhere to Network policy concerning wardrobe.

Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic.

Now how are these perpetually half naked bimbos stars going to deal with this setback?  Well expect more ‘wardrobe malfunctions’ and ‘accidental’ nipple slips.  Maybe Rihanna, while bending to pick up something, maybe the award, will rip her dress or something.   Who knows, maybe someone would show up wearing the intimacy 2.0.  We’ll see…or we won’t

In the meantime, don’t plan on going ga ga over Ga Ga’s ta tas.